Just so you know guys, this is why everyone who does know how to program well in some other language hate perl.

if(false){
print "Seriously.  What the fuck.";
}

I bet there's some semi-logical reason, once you know gobs of perl, why this would possibly make sense. But for everyone else it cannot make any sense at all. And there are dozens of similar little things that prevent you from writing more than 5 lines at a time without testing them to make sure they do exactly what you think they should do.

if 1 * 2 < 3:
    print "hello, world!"